The recorded version of this became the ‘music’ for my piece, recently performed at Love, Us 2013.
A Love Story
(for my someday child)
The truth is, I thought you would be here now.
In my younger years, I had life figured out.
You, your daddy and I, we live in a house. A yard, a dog, a fence, by now.
We count the ways we love, you, your daddy and I. Tea parties and swings and picnics by now.
The other truth is, I’m scared for you.
Life, perfect before you. For you.
Heal backs of hearts.
Matching dishes, wallpaper, 401ks.
Mend cracks in souls.
Ironed shirts, rolling pins, family trees.
I know now, there is no perfect. I will tell you this. Tell you to live.
Now. And everyday thereafter.
Sing shout laugh cry. Be.
Scream dance hug laugh. Be.
Rejoice. You are powerful.
Speak. You are truth.
Pause. You are beauty.
Speak read share laugh. Be.
Dance laugh dance. Be.
Paint, bold. Learn the names of colors.
Forever cherish the shades that make us all magnificent. Brilliant.
Travel wander trust. Share.
Love. You are worthy.
I haven’t found your daddy yet.
But I promise he is kind, generous, loving.
He laughs, silly. Creates, and stays curious about the world.
We dance, you, your daddy and I.
We sing, you, your daddy and I.
And he loves you. All the way as much as I do.
There is a mourning I didn’t allow myself to have.
Perhaps, I don’t want children.
Lips gasp back words as they tumble from dark within.
Steeled heart soldiers past mines deep within.
I have always, always wanted you.
I know this now.
I know, now. I am, now.
I promise, now.
To sing dance laugh. Be.
To trust hug cherish. Be.
To scream speak pause. Be.
Above all else, I promise to love you with all of my heart. And then some.
The truth is, I already do.
Here’s to another day of creativity…